Humour Etc.

Tubecrush: man ogling.

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From The New York Times:

One More Thing Goes to the Web: Subway Ogling By Austin Considine

As a personal trainer, Ed Norman knows he has good biceps. But he didn’t realize they had their own secret admirers until he rode the London Underground earlier this year.

Thanks to a Web-trawling friend, Mr. Norman, 27, learned that his photo had been taken surreptitiously on the Underground and posted on a new Web site, TubeCrush.net, under the title “Popeye Guns!” There he was (“Popeye”) in a black T-shirt with bulging arm muscles, reading a newspaper.

Mr. Norman, who lives and works in London, was checking e-mail in bed with his girlfriend when he got the flattering news. “I think she was a little more freaked out about it than I was,” he said.

Equal parts photo blog, personal ad and online stalking tool, TubeCrush was started in London last spring as a place for Underground riders to upload and share photos of men on the train who caught their eye. (Yes, only men.)

Stephen Motion, 30, a sales manager, said he and his roommates started the site for fun. Within a few months, the press had seized on it, and the site was receiving thousands of unique visits daily.

The natural next step was New York. In July, they announced that they had created an M.T.A. version, SubwayCrush.net. Mr. Motion said it has 4,000 to 28,000 unique visits a day. Next year, the founders plan to add photos of women and a means for crushes to independently connect with admirers.

In some ways, the TubeCrush concept is the 21st-century incarnation of a lost variety of printed personal ad, in which people wrote seeking connection with that attractive regular at the bus stop or cafe. In 2000, Craigslist introduced its own free version, called Missed Connections, and it was only a matter of time before photos entered the mix, the perfection of the camera phone having made stealth photography especially easy. To unsuspecting subjects, an admiring photographer is as likely to be checking e-mail as snapping a shutter.Read the rest of the article here.

And a sample:

tubecrush
tubecrush

Date: 16th January 2012

Line: Northern

Submitted by: MotioS

This crush’ee certainly is one for those tall, dark and handsome admirers. He looks a little startled as he realises his picture is being taken! Either that or he is chuckling at a comedy podcast of Michael McIntyre. Which do you think it is? Hmmm

What girls and guys think about during sex.

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NSFW language!

Doggy Toys: http://jennamarblesblog.com/shop Please subscribe to my channel and my vlog channel! I make new videos here every Wednesday and make vlogs during my majestical daily life. JennaMarbles JennaMarblesVlog Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Jenna-Mourey/311917224927 Twitter: https://twitter.com/#!/Jenna_Marbles @Jenna_Marbles @CharlesMarbles @Kermit_thedog Merchandise (dog toys, shirts and more): http://jennamarblesblog.com/shop Blog: http://www.jennamarblesblog.com/ Tumblr: http://jennamarbles.tumblr.com/

Doggy Toys: (not for sex) http://jennamarblesblog.com/shop Please subscribe to my channel and my vlog channel! I make new videos here every Wednesday and make vlogs during my majestical daily life. JennaMarbles JennaMarblesVlog Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Jenna-Mourey/311917224927 Twitter: https://twitter.com/#!/Jenna_Marbles @Jenna_Marbles @CharlesMarbles @Kermit_thedog Merchandise (dog toys, shirts and more): http://jennamarblesblog.com/shop Blog: http://www.jennamarblesblog.com/ Tumblr: http://jennamarbles.tumblr.com/

Jizz in My Pants.

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A classic, courtesy of Lonely Island (Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer and Jorma Taccone): 

http://Itunes.com/thelonelyisland The first single from The Lonely Island's debut album "INCREDIBAD". In stores 02/10/2009. Video features guest appearances by Molly Sims, Jamie Lynn Sigler, and Justin Timberlake. The Lonely Island is Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer and Jorma Taccone. (Directed by Kiv) Copyright - Universal Republic

Sex myths, explained.

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From Cracked, passed along by Jenna (thanks!):

#6. Beer Goggles

Science Shows...

As it happens, beer goggles are a real live scientific phenomenon. Scientists tested a group of 84 British students with some lime-flavored drinks. Some of those drinks were non-alcoholic, some were spiked with vodka to get the subject good and sauced. We like to think they served these drinks in beakers and graduated cylinders, in true nerd fashion.

In a laboratory simulation of 'cruising for chicks on Facebook after downing a six pack,' the scientists showed the college students photos of both males and females and had students play the scientific method's first documented instance of would you rather. What they discovered was that the students with the spiked drinks found the people in the photos more attractive--even the heterosexual students looking at people of their own gender.

The other 5 myths are discussed here.

Baconlube.

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From the geniuses that brought you Bacon Salt, Bacon Croutons, Bacon Lip Balm and Baconaise, now comes Baconlube.

The product description from J&D's:

Before you start giving meat-flavored massages, we have one small admission to make - baconlube began as an elaborate April Fool's prank and was never intended to be a real product. But when the joke ended, the emails kept coming. People harassed us via email, in public and in highly inappropriate ways (thanks for that). The waiting list grew to over 3,000 people. Expectations were built.

So who's responsible for this highly anticipated creation actually coming to life? You are, that's who. You and an intern named Martin actually, who sacrificed and offended his taste buds in the name of science on sample after failed sample before this really did taste like bacon.

We'll make no judgments about why you want this or what you want to do with it, but baconlube is here and it's real for a limited time. Keep It Sizzlin'.

Their homepage can be found here.

Unintentionally pervy kid's toys.

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Courtesy of Cracked (and indirectly passed along by Lu - thanks!):

There's absolutely nothing wrong with this doll, as long as it's not in motion. Sure, maybe a crude teenage boy could say that his right hand is sort of positioned like it's holding an invisible boner. But when you activate the little lever on Tarzan's back, that's when the magic happens.

There's no mistaking what he's doing. They implanted a mechanism that really can only do that. Mattel changed the doll after approximately 100 percent of the boys who picked up the toy started making Tarzan jerk off within about 10 seconds.

Disney's 1999 marketing goof, or gag. Who knows?

See the other 14 toys here.

The gay lifestyle.

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A scathingly satirical article at the Huffington Post by gay Professor of Theater and Chair of the Theater and Dance department, Ursinus College:

I live the gay lifestyle, the gay lifestyle that is often mentioned by some Republican candidates for president. For those who are unfamiliar with the lifestyle, this is a typical day:

7:00 a.m. I wake up, and just as I have done every morning since puberty, I choose to be gay today. This will come as a great relief to my gay, homosexual, male lover who lies beside me. Because being gay is a choice, our relationship is a gamble day to day. Even though we have both chosen to remain gay and to be together every day for the past 16 years, we never take anything for granted. One of us just might throw in the towel one day and give up the lifestyle.

7:30 a.m. I take a gay shower and let the gay water rinse off my gay body.

8:00 a.m. I have a gay breakfast of cereal with milk, and a good, strong, gay cup of coffee. I am fortified for another day of ruining the fabric of American society.

9:00 a.m. I start my morning shift as a gay hospital volunteer. The hospital is not gay, just me. The patients are mostly normal people. But it is OK. The hospital has a rule that all volunteers must sanitize their hands before meeting with patients. This is to avoid spreading germs, but I think that hand sanitizer is also effective in stopping the transfer of my gayness to other people.

12:00 p.m. I return home, eat a gay lunch and take my gay dogs for a walk. Well, I am not sure if the dogs are actually gay. I have heard it said that homosexuality does not exist in the animal kingdom because it is not natural, so chances are that the dogs are not gay. But because they live with me and my gay, homosexual, male lover, they are perceived by others to be gay. I would feel bad about this, but the fact is that I need these dogs. They are the closest that I will ever come to having actual children, because, as everyone knows, gays should not (and cannot) have children. I push this out of my mind as I walk the dogs gaily through the neighborhood.

Read the rest of it here.

Funny nerds.

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The real headline for an article at The Cosmos News explaining why Uranus' axis has shifted substantially:

Uranus takes a pounding more frequently than thought

And the equally funny first paragraph of the article:

Uranus isn't just gassy, it's also tilted completely sideways, such that instead of rotating like a spinning top, it rolls around the plane of the solar system more like a giant ball. Now astronomers think they know how this happened, and it means that Uranus has been pounded really, really hard not once, but twice.

Read the rest of the article here.

And yes, I'm still 13.

Currently the oddest video on the web?

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Via Violet Blue: 

Watch the Official Video for Big Bad Wolf by Duck Sauce Download now on iTunes: http://cot.ag/uyPiKL Follow Big Beat: Site: http://wearebigbeat.com Like: http://fb.com/wearebigbeat Follow: http://twitter.com/wearebigbeat Listen: https://soundcloud.com/wearebigbeat Follow Duck Sauce: https://www.facebook.com/ducksaucenyc

Perhaps studying delirium will help with interpreting this masterpiece of weirdness.