Sex Ed

East India Comedy: Sex Education in India.

in ,

From the description:

The health ministry of India recently [summer 2014] suggested that sex education be banned in the country. We look at India's attitude towards sex through a "government approved" sex education lecture.

The health ministry of India recently suggested that sex education be banned in the country. We look at India's attitude towards sex through a "government approved" sex education lecture. This video is a work of fiction that bears no resemblance to any human being living, dead, or abstaining from sex.


TEDx: Debby Herbenick on Making Sex Normal.

in ,

The belief that human beings -- throughout their lives -- deserve to have access to accurate information about their bodies and sexuality drives much of Debby Herbenick's work. Among her greatest passions is translating sexual science to the general public through teaching, books, columns, podcasts, television, social media, blogging, crafting, public art, and her latest project: Make Sex Normal.

Sex-positive parenting.

in ,

From the Huffington Post:

This Is What Sex-Positive Parenting Really Looks Like By Lea Grover

[…]

I'm what some people call "sex-positive." That doesn't mean I talk with my 4-year-olds about how great sex is and how good it feels. It means I don't pretend it's something other than it is.

As parents, we lie all the time. About the Easter Bunny or Santa or the Tooth Fairy, about how long 10 minutes is, about whether or not we remembered they wanted to have grilled cheese for dinner again... We lie a lot. But one thing I never lie about is sex.

I don't want them to grow up ashamed of their bodies or confused about what they do. I don't tell them about cabbage patches or storks; I make an effort, always, to be honest about human reproduction. Every aspect of it.

[…]

Because lying to your kids about sex helps nobody. Telling them that sex is "only between mommies and daddies" is a lie that leads to confused, hormone-charged teenagers. Telling them that sex is "only something that happens when two people love each other very much" is a lie that causes hormone-charged teenagers to confuse "love" with "lust," or "obsession." It leads to leaps of logic like, "If I have sex with this person, we must be in love." Or worse: "If I love this person, I have to have sex with him or her." And how many teenage tragedies are based on that misconception?

The truth is that human beings, almost universally, like sex. It feels good. And it's supposed to feel good. If it didn't, the human race would die out. The truth is that sex isn't special and magical just because it's sex. The truth is that you can have spectacular sex with strangers whose names you don't even know. The truth is that just because you can, that doesn't necessarily mean you should.

And that's what sex-positive parenting really is. Not telling my kids lies about sex to keep them from behaviors I don't think are healthy. It's telling them the truth, the whole truth, and letting it sink in so they can make their own good choices.

Go read the rest here - it's a great piece.

Rev Bev Talks Kink.

in ,

Generally speaking, increased religiosity is associated with more conservative (and often negative) attitudes about sex. But, there is huge variation within religions when it comes to attitudes towards sex. As an example, Rev Bev is an ordained clergy in the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) who offers very sex positive sex advice and information (check out her website here). This is a clip of her discussing BDSM: 

Rev Dr Beverly Dale explores various moral guidelines for a wide variety of sexual practices.She does this in a non-judgmental way and with a sense of humor! Watch out! Rev Bev has served as a church pastor and a campus minister at the University of Pennsylvania and is an ordained clergy in the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ).

You can check out the rest of her video clips on her YouTube channel, here. Apparently, there is no topic she is not willing to discuss.

The straight goods on sex ed.

in , ,

From the Pacific Standard:

What If We Admitted to Children That Sex Is Primarily About Pleasure? By Alice Dreger

A couple of months ago, the sex education notice came home in my nine-year-old son’s backpack. I didn’t realize that, in our district, sex ed starts in the fourth grade. Another sign of the state having more access to my baby than I sometimes wish.

When I handed the note to my mate at the dinner table, our son said with something of a proud smile, “I told Mrs. Reverby we’ve already talked about it at home.”

The mate and I looked at each other and obviously had the same thought. Two weeks before, the class had been learning about electricity. The teacher had gotten stuck on some questions about batteries, so she had turned to our son, who was able to explain to the class exactly how batteries charge, recharge, and discharge. He’s learned a lot about electricity at home.

And quite a lot about sex.

“You know,” my mate said to our son, “this is one of those times when you have to not help the teacher even if you know how something works.”

I busted out laughing at the admonition. “Your dad is right,” I said, composing myself. “It’s entirely possibly you know more about sex than they do, but there’s some stuff some parents might not want their kids to know, so you have to keep a lid on it.”

But really. This was the kid who in preschool answered a teacher’s “Good morning, how are you today?” with “I’m fine, but my mother is menstruating, so her uterine lining is sloughing.” I just shrugged and explained to her that he’d seen blood on the toilet paper and wanted to know if I was OK.

Go read the rest here.

TED: Al Vernacchio - Sex needs a new metaphor. Here's one ...

in

From TED:

For some reason, says educator Al Vernacchio, the metaphors for talking about sex in the US all come from baseball -- scoring, getting to first base, etc. The problem is, this frames sex as a competition, with a winner and a loser. Instead, he suggests a new metaphor, one that's more about shared pleasure, discussion and agreement, fulfillment and enjoyment. Let's talk about ... pizza.

For some reason, says educator Al Vernacchio, the metaphors for talking about sex in the US all come from baseball -- scoring, getting to first base, etc. The problem is, this frames sex as a competition, with a winner and a loser.


The Sexplainer.

in , , ,

Marnie Goldenberg is a sex educator from Vancouver (check out her Facebook page here and her blog here). Her work is brilliant and ties in nicely with the themes discussed during the section on Sex Ed that we're covering this week.

The Vancouver Sun recently published an in-depth article about here work:

Sexplain that!: Raising sexually intelligent kids is a job for parents By Denise Ryan

When I told my son that I was going to a get-together of parents to talk with an expert about how to talk to our kids about sex, he flashed me the kind of look you would expect from a 12-year-old boy.

A mix of horror, revulsion, and something else I couldn’t quite identify. Curiosity, maybe?

“Why are you looking at me like that?” I asked.

He struggled to find the words, finally settling on these: “It’s just that I think you moms are a little bit naive.”

Armed with that assessment, he was dispatched to spend the evening with a friend and I set off to find out just how naive I was.

Marnie Goldenberg launched her Vancouver “Sexplainer” salons after making a career switch from lawyer to sexual- health educator. Now she’s offering sexual-health education for parents, aimed at helping them raise “sexually intelligent kids.” In the casual atmosphere of private homes, parents get together, split the cost — about $300 for an evening — and have a facilitated discussion focused on how to communicate effectively about sexuality with kids of all ages.

“Educated kids are safer kids,” says Goldenberg. “I want to give people skills, and empower them to be proactive.”

Goldenberg is tapping into a growing need. Parents want, and need help navigating conversations with kids that are growing up in a culture of sexuality that is changing at warp speed.

Read the rest of the article here.

High school student takes on AO sex ed.

in ,

From ThinkProgress:

High Schooler Protests ‘Slut-Shaming’ Abstinence Assembly Despite Alleged Threats From Her Principal

A West Virginia high school student is filing an injunction against her principal, who she claims is threatening to punish her for speaking out against a factually inaccurate abstinence assembly at her school. Katelyn Campbell, who is the student body vice president at George Washington High School, alleges her principal threatened to call the college where she’s been accepted to report that she has “bad character.”

George Washington High School recently hosted a conservative speaker, Pam Stenzel, who travels around the country to advocate an abstinence-only approach to teen sexuality. Stenzel has a long history of using inflammatory rhetoric to convince young people that they will face dire consequences for becoming sexually active. At GW’s assembly, Stenzel allegedly told students that “if you take birth control, your mother probably hates you” and “I could look at any one of you in the eyes right now and tell if you’re going to be promiscuous.” She also asserted that condoms aren’t safe, and every instance of sexual contact will lead to a sexually transmitted infection.

Campbell refused to attend the assembly, which was funded by a conservative religious organization called “Believe in West Virginia” and advertised with fliers that proclaimed “God’s plan for sexual purity.” Instead, she filed a complaint with the ACLU and began to speak out about her objections to this type of school-sponsored event. Campbell called Stenzel’s presentation “slut shaming” and said that it made many students uncomfortable.

GW Principal George Aulenbacher, on the other hand, didn’t see anything wrong with hosting Stenzel. “The only way to guarantee safety is abstinence. Sometimes, that can be a touchy topic, but I was not offended by her,” he told the West Virginia Gazette last week.

But it didn’t end with a simple difference of opinion among Campbell and her principal. The high school senior alleges that Aulenbacher threatened to call Wellesley College, where Campbell has been accepted to study in the fall, after she spoke to the press about her objections to the assembly. According to Campbell, her principal said, “How would you feel if I called your college and told them what bad character you have and what a backstabber you are?” Campbell alleges that Aulenbacher continued to berate her in his office, eventually driving her to tears. “He threatened me and my future in order to put forth his own personal agenda and make teachers and students feel they cant speak up because of fear of retaliation,” she said of the incident.

Despite being threatened, Campbell is not backing down. She hopes that filing this injunction will protect her freedom of speech to continue advocating for comprehensive sexual health resources for West Virginia’s youth. “West Virginia has the ninth highest pregnancy rate in the U.S.,” Campbell told the Gazette. “I should be able to be informed in my school what birth control is and how I can get it. With the policy at GW, under George Aulenbacher, information about birth control and sex education has been suppressed. Our nurse wasn’t allowed to talk about where you can get birth control for free in the city of Charleston.”

Campbell’s complaints about her high school reflect a problematic trend across the country. There are serious consequences when figures like Stenzel repeatedly tell young Americans that contraception isn’t safe. Partly because of the scientific misinformation that often pervades abstinence-only curricula, an estimated 60 percent of young adults are misinformed about birth control’s effectiveness — and some of those teens choose not to use it because they assume it won’t make any difference. Predictably, the states that lack adequate sex ed requirements are also the states that have the highest rates of teen pregnancy and STDs.

Some of Campbell’s fellow students at GW High School are also rallying for her cause. They plan to take up the issue at a local board of education meeting, which is scheduled for Thursday evening.

And a tweet from Wellesley College in response to all the brouhaha:

Course on pornography?

in , ,

This story makes me feel very grateful to teach where I teach.

From the College Fix:

College Offers Course Devoted Entirely To Pornography

A relatively new Pasadena City College class called “Navigating Pornography” – devoted to giving students a venue to study and discuss a touchy topic in an academic setting, according to its professor – has already prompted praise and concern.

First offered last spring, the class is a for-credit elective open to all students and does not require any prerequisites. In just one year, it’s come under national scrutiny after its instructor, Professor Hugo Schwyzer, invited a porn star to speak to its students.

But Schwyzer defended Navigating Pornography in an interview with The College Fix, calling the subject matter legitimate.

“(The course) focuses on giving students tools to understand pornography as a historical and contemporary phenomenon,” Schwyzer told The College Fix. “Students today live in a porn-saturated culture and very rarely get a chance to learn about it in a safe, non-judgmental, intellectually thoughtful way.”

[...]

He said he hopes students come out of the course with a better personal understanding of some of the seminal issues of pornography, such as: “why we love porn … why some people are deeply troubled by it … and how both to make decisions about porn in their own lives and how to have conversations about porn with others.”

Response to the course in the Pasadena community has been “excellent” in most respects, “save from some in the administration and the community,” according to Schwyzer.

“Students welcome it,” he adds.

Yet in an interview with The College Fix, a colleague of Schwyzer’s who teaches at the same community college called the course “absolutely appalling.” He asked not to be named, citing tension at the campus over the course, which recently prompted a wave of national controversy over its guest speakers: porn stars.

Read the rest here.

Sex ed gone wrong.

in ,

From Reddit via BuzzFeed:

26 Ridiculous Sex-Ed Fails

New York high school students learn in sex ed that the definition of "vagina" is "sperm depository" and that gay people don't exist according to a new study [PDF] by the New York Civil Liberties Union. The students also learn that if you have sex you WILL get an STD. The NYCLU report came out this month, but months before all this a Reddit user outed her New York school — saying the same thing. Here is that original Reddit post and 25 other examples of sex ed fails.

1. "What are the two uses of the vagina?"

2. The clitoris is for peeing.

3. "Use the pull-out method."

See the other 23 here.